When I am not reading...I write!

I don’t know if I ever really wanted to be friends with them. It was comfortable, they were consistent and they seem to care as much as I would allow them too but I liked being alone. Tia talked too damn much and Charisma could be fickle. She attached to people so quickly and I always worried about her letting someone to close. For some reason people like to hurt her. They took her for granted and sucked her dry. I would never tell her that tho. In my raspy voice I would just say “damn” and I would just trace the flowers on the comforter of her bed and listen to her as she told the story of another who wronged her. I would trace the tulips, then the roses, then the gerber daisies and Charisma would just go on and on about how she didn’t understand why anyone wouldn’t treat her the way she treated them. She had so much to learn about life. I already knew a lot because I had two older sisters.

I went to lay flat on the bed and as soon as I stretched, I tensed up trying block what I knew was coming. I sneezed really hard and violent and loud “Achoooooo” immediately my body ached. Whenever I try to stop myself from sneezing it leaves me with an temporary aching pain in my neck, shoulders and chest. I breathe slow until it passes, readjust myself on the bed and begin tracing flowers again. This time I use my left hand pointer finger and allow my right hand to slide back and forth across the carpet. The carpet is thick but still low and the strokes of my fingertips back and forth against the fabric is satisfyingly weird for some reason. I am just getting my sensory engagement on when I hear Tia say my name. “Huh” I look up at her and take in her face. Her mouth is moving but I am not listening. I am still drawing her eyes with my mind, I haven’t created her mouth yet so, I am not listening. She pauses for a minute..and lets me finish my game. I complete her chin quickly because I don’t like it and I yawn again and “Achoooooo” another big sneeze comes out.

I mumble to Charisma she should wash her dusty ass sheets and then I acknowledge Tia again. She sighs and lays beside me on the bed. “Ashley, are you okay”? I look at her and say “I will be”. Charisma twirls to face me, she’s sitting in a computer chair. She uses her feet to walk/roll towards me on the chair and looks down at me and Tia on the bed. She says “Is your heat still off”. I reply “yep”. She rolls her eyes and shakes her head with disappointment and then worry crosses her face for a minute. “I can ask My Daddy and Mama to pay it for y’all, like they did last time”. I contemplate it but then remember that her Daddy also stopped by after they paid that bill as wondered if it was even worth it. I was tired of being a cold at night and I was never gonna shake this cold if that didn’t improve...

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